Setting Boundaries – Time as a currency
“Even with the desire for a better life we can be reluctant to do the work of boundaries because it will be a war. The battle falls into two categories: outside resistance we get from others and the resistance we get from ourselves.”
-Henry Cloud, Boundaries: When to Say Yes, How to Say No to Take Control of Your Life
As mom’s we often feel that the world is resting on our shoulders from taking care of the kids to working full-time and everything in-between. How many of us are constantly spreading ourselves way too thin because we are constantly saying “Yes” to everything and everyone? When you do say “no”, do you ever have that inner dialogue running through your head – “I hope they aren’t mad at me now since I told them no.” “Maybe I should just call them back and tell them yes.”
Setting boundaries is healthy, and not meant to disappoint those that are asking us for things or time. Setting boundaries is meant to help us better understand our limits and enrich our time; mentally, physically, emotionally and spiritually. A great teaching from Sunday was, “when you say “no” to something then you are able to say “yes” to something else.”
When you lack those boundaries and the ability to say “no” you are taking away time from some of the most important gifts God has given you. When you have no boundaries your relationships with family, friends and God suffers because you don’t have the time to devote to those important aspects in your life.
Have you ever thought of your time as being a currency in the same way as we think about money? I really hadn’t thought about it that way until I heard Pastor Nate refer to it in our sermon in this way, “the two most critical currencies of our age are time and money.” There is no way to have an abundance of both at the same time.
This circles back to last week’s post, when do we have enough? In our society we are constantly adding things but never subtracting things to enhance our lives. When we are always adding things, we need more money that requires more time to be working. If we just sit back and enjoy the things God has blessed us with, we can take advantage of the precious currency of time. Our time is limited, we only have as much time as God has written in our story.
Do not store up for yourselves treasures on earth, where moths and vermin destroy, and where thieves break in and steal. But store up for yourselves treasures in heaven, where months and vermin do not destroy and where thieves do not break and steal. For where your treasure is, there your heart will be also. (Matthew 6:19-21)
What are you saying “no” to for the ability to say “yes” to something else? What is that yes? What are you going to subtract from your life to enhance it? When adding something to it ask yourself these questions, “Is this item going to make me a better person, how is it going to enhance my life, is it going to bring me closer to my goals, and is it going to bring me closer to God?” If the answer is “no”, then do you really need it?